Remember to ask open-ended questions the other person can elaborate on, rather than questions that can be answered “yes” or “no. " For instance, it’s better to ask, “What did you do today?” instead of, “Did you have a good day?”
Try asking something like, “What did you end up choosing for dinner earlier? Was it any good?” You might also say, “I meant to ask, but you said something about planning a trip next weekend. Where are you heading?”
This is especially great if they mention they’ve been spending a lot of time at home watching TV, reading books, or listening to podcasts. Just say something like, “I’ve been wanting to get into podcasts, where should I start?” or “I need a new show to binge-watch, any suggestions?"[5] X Expert Source Julia McCurleyCertified Professional Matchmaker Expert Interview. 30 September 2021.
Try saying something like, “Okay, I need your serious opinion. Be honest. Waffles, pancakes, or French toast? There’s only one right answer. "
For example, you might talk about something cool you learned in school, tell a funny story, or mention that it’s the third day in a row you saw a rainbow. If you haven’t done much, try talking about something that’s going on around you. Maybe your kid sister is dyeing your dog purple, or maybe you have new neighbors moving in, for instance. You never know what will spark a conversation, so don’t be afraid to throw out something random!
For instance, you might share something you really appreciate about them by saying something like, “You always make me feel better when I’m down. You’re the best!” or “I miss your amazing smile. “[10] X Research source You might also mention something of theirs you really like, such as, “I meant to ask you where you got that awesome jacket you were wearing the other day. That looked so cool on you!”
If you have a great story to share, open by saying something like, “The craziest thing happened at work today,” or “You’ll never guess who I saw!” This can also be a fun way to let the other person know you’re thinking of them. If you’re eating at a restaurant you know they love, for instance, you might say, “Guess where I am right now!” (Bonus points if you offer to bring them take-out. )
Try asking lighthearted questions like, “Who was your favorite Disney princess growing up?” or “Did you have any awesome holiday traditions as a kid?”
If you can’t think of anything, try sharing a funny meme with the person, instead![14] X Research source
For instance, you might say, “I was just wondering why people never evolved with purple hair,” or “Have you ever noticed our math classroom always smells like mustard?”
If the other person says they can’t talk because they’re busy, you’ll understand more about why the text conversation was starting to slow down!
You don’t necessarily have to go full-on ghost, and don’t turn it into a waiting game where you don’t text the person back for exactly 17-and-a-half minutes. Just find something else to do for a little while and see if the other person is still feeling chatty.
If your text conversations usually seem like they don’t go anywhere, you and the other person might just not be connecting. That’s totally fine—not everyone has to be interested in you. Focus your energy on the people who do want to spend time talking to you![19] X Research source
