Bring strawberries and champagne for a tasty start to romance and turn on music that sets the mood. If you’re used to caressing each other without clothes on, you can run a feather over your partner’s leg or softly kiss them while wearing a colorful silk robe. There are endless possibilities with the five senses. You can use a candle with a spicy scent one week, and then put on a sweet perfume or cologne the next. Say what you need, want and fantasize about. Be direct, as this allows for the conversation which will lead to more enjoyable sex. [2] X Expert Source Susan Pazak, PhDLicensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach Expert Interview. 22 February 2022.
It’s okay if some of the positions aren’t the best fit or need some adjustments. You two are just figuring it all out together. Be vocal with each other about which positions feel the best. That way, you can keep prioritizing them. Furniture and fun add-ons to your home, like swings, are a great way to find new positions to try out.
Tease out even more information and ask when or how all those fantasies started. You’ll get a deeper understanding of your partner. ”Do you think we could try…? I’ve never done that before. ” Studies show that you both can feel physically aroused just talking about your fantasies.
Discuss the values you both have. Maybe one partner needs intimacy after work is done in order to be present. You may prefer an emotional connection and prefer sex after lots of quality time. For example, you can ask: ”Would you like me to be more tender or taboo in the bedroom?” Communicate about desires and limits. You’ll both feel more comfortable when you outline what you really like and what you’re not really into. [8] X Expert Source Susan Pazak, PhDLicensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach Expert Interview. 22 February 2022.
Since you’ll already have the logistics sorted out, you’ll already know that there’s a chance to have sex with your partner. Scheduled sex might be a little different from spontaneous sex sometimes, but it’s always a thoughtful way to show up for one another. Remember that putting sex on your calendar is just one way to increase the frequency of your intimacy. This is just one trick you can try, along with lots of other ones.
For a fun activity, you and your partner can try to have sex on every surface in the house. You can make a list of places you’ve always wanted to have some quick fun in. Just make sure there’s enough privacy and you’re not breaking any rules. You can also make the bedroom a little different by adding a mirror so you can watch yourselves.
Maybe there’s a hotel where you both can go wild, order room service, and forget about any chores afterward. You might also pass a wine bar that gives you two “first date” memories. Head on in, order two glasses and some appetizers, and lay on the physical affection. You can rub your partner’s leg while they caress your arm. You can also go to big events, like concerts or even a wedding, then slip away somewhere private to kiss.
You can play out this scenario any way you want. You both can meet somewhere casual, like a coffee shop or a bookstore. This fantasy might feel a little taboo, which can make the experience even more exciting. You can even repeat this roleplay multiple times. You can use new names, wear different outfits, and meet up in various locations.
Think about compliments your partner has given you. If they love your legs, make sure to text a picture of them. Vague details can be really exciting because they leave so much to the imagination. For example, you can say: “I was just thinking of you while I was in the shower!” Research has shown that when your partner is looking forward to intimacy with you, they’ll be even more satisfied once they experience it.
You can also tease your partner before going to the gym. Try wearing the kinds of workout clothes that they just can’t get enough of and love seeing you in. Exercise will also help improve your sleep, which can help you feel more energized in your sex life. Working out releases endorphins, which reduce stress and perk up your mood, and oxytocin, which makes you feel content and affectionate.
You can smile or nod when you look in your partner’s eyes and see all the feelings they’re experiencing. They’ll feel deeply connected to you. You can also hold each other’s hands tightly as you look at each other. You’ll express how inspired and in love you are. Some studies suggest that eye contact signals romantic interest. When you make sure to use lots of it with your partner, you’ll make them swoon again.
“Does it feel good when I do this?” “How are you doing? Is this okay with you?” “You are so special to me. I adore you. ”
You two might also experience some nostalgia. Usually, the first stages of a relationship involve some slow and steady seduction. You can also spend some time apart so you can crave each other’s touch again. You can travel or arrange a trip with your friends. Test each other and see how long you both can draw out your foreplay before you give in.
As you hug, you two can talk about what you enjoyed the most about your sex, or you can just switch topics and appreciate each other’s company. Nonsexual touch after sex helps to create a sense of trust and relief. Studies also report that you’ll feel more satisfied with your sex if you cuddle afterward.
